Just checking in…

28 Oct

11:11 pm

I’m still here!  So busy.  It’s got to stop.

While I’m still sober, I miss my “old” sober kite–the one that was me, up high and coaxing my own path through the sky.  Right now, I’m buried in the mud of transition, and while it’s been mostly smooth, it still feels thick.  And foggy a lot of the time.

I’ve been here for about 10 weeks, and my back-to-the-rat race lifestyle is finally catching up with me–too tired to wonder anymore, too busy running to notice that I’m missing the phases of the moon.

I’m moving along, though, and toward a goal that inevitably had to be set.  I have thought about drinking more than once, and that sort of sucks.  To me, it’s representative of how happy, fulfilled, inspired I feel–or don’t.  I felt like I owned my life and my happiness 10 weeks ago; now, not so much.  I’m not sure what to do about that.

I really just wanted to post quickly–and at last!–tonight to let you know that I’m here, doing pretty well (the fears I had didn’t materialize, so there’s that!).  More soon, I hope!

12 Responses to “Just checking in…”

  1. losedabooze October 28, 2015 at 7:39 am #

    Nice to hear from you … sorry you feel a bit foggy but the skies will clear again. I remember in a talk once where it talked about cycles of life and how the winds of change go through periods… this is just a phase… and hopefully you’ll come out to a brighter and clearer outlook.

    • Bren Murphy October 28, 2015 at 8:15 pm #

      I agree with Losedabooze – emotions and feelings can go up and down like the tides, but we are the rocks on the shore, eroded a little maybe, but steadfast and solid – always.

  2. Rebecca A. Watson October 28, 2015 at 8:52 am #

    Yay! Good to hear from you. Hang in there. The stars are aligning for all sorts of good ❤

  3. changingcoursenow October 28, 2015 at 11:19 am #

    Hang in there girlfriend! Just another bump in the road. You’ll regret going backward – you know you will. We’re all here pulling for you in whatever you endeavor. Hugs!

  4. jenisthesoberist October 28, 2015 at 1:02 pm #

    I am finding that transitions are really difficult for me as well. Give yourself some time…I bet that things will balance out a bit. Don’t forget self-care! Thoughts are only thoughts…thankfully. So nice to hear from you DDG.

  5. thirstystill October 28, 2015 at 2:16 pm #

    Good to hear you’re doing well, or at least OK, despite the transition. Big change is tough. But remember, thinking about drinking isa far cry from drinking, and you’re the one in charge of deciding not to drink. I hope you find a way to find little bits of island life that nourished you now that you’re back in the fast paced. And I hope you enjoy some of the fast pace, too! xo

  6. ainsobriety October 28, 2015 at 2:19 pm #

    Glad you are well! Take care of yourself!

  7. primrose October 28, 2015 at 3:33 pm #

    how nice to hear from you! take ridiculously good care of yourself, do you hear me?!

  8. carrieonsober October 28, 2015 at 6:30 pm #

    Hang in there lady. You know there are better things and drinking never works/helps/enhances anything – sober girls still rule 😘 xx

  9. Lisa Neumann October 30, 2015 at 8:32 pm #

    DDG … You’ve risen from the pumpkin patch! FYI: I can still think a cocktail is a good idea, until I do not. Thank goodness for a “2nd thought.” Love you darling

  10. suz moore October 31, 2015 at 6:52 am #

    I admire you – it is now a few days after your post so I hope you are feeling more in control. As I think someone in a cheesy movie once said “failure it NOT an option”, Can you even imagine how you would feel if you have gone through all of this and then erased all that ridiculously hard work with heavy red water.in a green bottle. Treat yourself to some other self-indulgence, I am sure there is something you really enjoy to reward yourself for getting through the foggy phase. Thinking of you.

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